Do you ever feel like there is a puzzle piece missing from your life? Or maybe you see your reflection similar to a shattered mirror?

Feeling whole as a person matters because a sense of wholeness contributes to a balanced, happy and meaningful life. Everyone has a right to feel complete. You deserve to feel complete.

In the fast-paced world, a lot of us grapple with a pervasive sense of incompleteness. From the relentless pressure of expectations, to the isolating impact of technology, there are various reasons many of us feel incomplete in the contemporary world.

Let’s explore some of the reasons why this is, and what we can do to feel a greater sense of wholeness.

Understanding what happens when we feel incomplete  

Understanding what makes us feel incomplete will help in addressing and mitigating these feelings. Here are some reasons we might feel in complete and not connected to our authentic sense of self.

Social comparison

Constantly comparing oneself to others can contribute to feelings of inadequacy. Unhealthy social comparisons may erode self-esteem and make it challenging to appreciate one's own unique qualities and contributions. 

External Validation

Relying heavily on external validation, such as seeking approval from others or defining self-worth through achievements, can result in a fragile sense of identity. The absence of external validation may lead to feelings of emptiness and unfulfillment.

Unresolved emotional pain or trauma

Past traumas and unresolved emotional wounds can create internal fractures, hindering the development of a healthy sense of self. Unaddressed trauma may lead to emotional distress, anxiety, and difficulty forming healthy relationships.

Lack of self-awareness

When we are not fully aware of what is important to us, or who we are, we can struggle with a sound sense of self. This lack of self-awareness can result in feelings of confusion and disconnection. 

Unrealistic expectations

Are you a perfectionist? Were you raised by parents or a guardian who set high expectations for you? Setting unrealistic expectations for yourself, whether in relationships, career, or personal development, can create a perpetual sense of falling short 😞. The inability to meet these expectations may lead to feelings of failure and inadequacy.

Disconnection from your passions

Ignoring or neglecting activities and pursuits that bring joy and fulfillment can contribute to a lack of wholeness. Disconnecting from one's passions may leave a void that is not easily filled by routine or external achievements.

Fragmentation of identity

The fast-paced and dynamic nature of modern life can contribute to a fragmented sense of identity. Juggling multiple roles and responsibilities may leave individuals feeling disconnected from their authentic selves.

Disconnection from nature

As we become increasingly urbanized and technologically connected rather than connected through family or the traditional market and community gatherings, there is a growing disconnection from nature… and each other.

This separation from the natural world, which has been a source of grounding and balance throughout human history, can contribute to feelings of emptiness.

Isolation and Lack of Community

Despite increased connectivity through technology, some individuals experience a sense of social isolation. The breakdown of traditional communities and a focus on individualism can leave people feeling disconnected and lonely.

Consumerism and Materialism

The emphasis on consumerism and material success as markers of a fulfilling life can lead to a perpetual pursuit of external validation and possessions. These external status markers and ‘things’ bring short term pleasure and do not bring lasting satisfaction, individuals may feel a sense of emptiness.

Overemphasis on achievement

Modern life often prioritises achievement and success, sometimes at the expense of well-being and personal fulfillment. 

The constant pursuit of goals without attention to personal values and intrinsic motivation can contribute to a feeling of hollowness.

Technology overload

Technology has brought huge benefits. Who doesn’t love having the knowledge of the world at our fingertips, video chats, or food arriving at our door in 20 minutes? However, the constant exposure to screens and digital communication can contribute to a sense of disconnection from the present moment and authentic human interactions.

UNWELL Mental Health

Conditions such as depression, anxiety, or other mental health issues can significantly impact the perception of wholeness. These conditions may distort one's self-image and hinder the ability to experience life with a sense of completeness, and the ability to connect with others.

The rewards of nurtureing your sense of wholeness

The pursuit of feeling whole is a crucial aspect of holistic well-being, influencing our mental, emotional, and physical health, as well as our relationships and the overall quality of our lives. It impacts our ability to live a complete life, with fewer regrets and pain.

A life that includes self-care, meaningful relationships, and a connection to one's authentic self can contribute to a sense of wholeness in the midst of modern challenges.

When we feel complete and integrated within ourselves, there is a reduction in internal conflicts and a greater capacity to manage stress. This, in turn, fosters mental resilience and emotional stability.

Addressing feelings of incompleteness in our modern world may involve:

• The reevaluation of your values—what you are prioritising in life

• Nurturing authentic connections

• Practicing mindfulness

• Finding a balance between the demands of contemporary society and personal well-being

• Get professional support—consider alternative therapies (like Self Directed Healing, Kinesiology, or Somatic Healing if you are unsatisfied with traditional ‘talking therapies’ and/or prescription drugs. These methods of healing work with the unconscious mind and healing intelligence of the body—not just the conscious mind. Consult your GP doctor before making any changes or engaging in therapy.

5 reasons to nurture your sense of wholeness

Healthy Relationships

Feeling whole allows us to engage in relationships from a place of strength rather than seeking validation or fulfillment from others. 

This healthier approach to relationships often leads to more satisfying and sustainable connections with others.

Personal fulfillment

When we feel whole, we are more likely to pursue our passions and utilize our unique talents. This contributes to a sense of purpose and accomplishment, fostering personal growth and the realization of our full potential.

Adaptability and resilience

Wholeness provides a solid foundation for adaptability and resilience in the face of life's challenges. It enables us to navigate uncertainties with a greater sense of self-assurance and the flexibility to learn and grow from experiences.

Physical health

There is a well-established connection between mental and physical health. Feeling whole contributes to a positive mindset, which can positively impact physical well-being through stress reduction and the promotion of healthy lifestyle choices.

Meaning and direction

A sense of wholeness often comes with clarity about one's values, goals, and purpose in life. This clarity provides a roadmap for meaningful living, offering direction and guiding decisions toward a fulfilling and purpose-driven existence.

How to feel complete. Tips for living authenticity 

Addressing feelings of incompleteness often involves a combination of self-reflection, therapy, coaching and intentional efforts to build a strong sense of self. 

Embracing self-compassion, practicing mindfulness, and seeking support from trusted individuals or professionals can be valuable steps toward cultivating a more holistic and fulfilling sense of identity and well-being.

Here’s an idea. Choose one of the tips below to focus on in the next few weeks and see what happens. Check in with how you are feeling.

1. Connection: Whether through meaningful relationships or shared experiences, the tapestry of life gains richness when woven with threads of genuine connection.

   Reach out to someone that lifts you up and fills your energetic cup. Have a chat or do something together. Let them know you appreciate them.

2. Creativity:  Just as the vibrant palette of an artist, adds hues to our existence, engaging in creative pursuits, like art, music, or any form of self-expression, allows us to tap into a wellspring of vitality!

   Get creative, set a creative goal and experience a sense of purpose and accomplishment. Life coaches (like Authentic State Coaching) are a perfect match for helping you set, break through blocks and keep accountable to realistic goals. 
   

3. Courage: Embracing challenges and overcoming fears opens new dimensions, contributing to a deep sense of self-empowerment and resilience.

   What have you been putting off? Propel yourself beyond your comfort zone--get support to move forward if you need it. 
   

4. Clarity: Understanding our values, passions, and purpose provides a compass for navigating the complexities, offering a steadying force amidst the uncertainties. Why not reach out to a life coach for a guiding light through life's labyrinth, so you can have a clear sense of direction. 
   

5. Nature: Immersing ourselves in the natural world fosters a profound connection to something greater. It grounds s in the present. The natural world is healing and giving.
   
   Where can you take yourself to connect with nature? Take yourself to a park, a forest, a garden, a body of water and let yourself connect to nature, the way you might if you were just vibing with a friend or partner. Listen and watch. Notice the small things. Check in with your feelings.

Collectively, these threads of connection, creativity, courage, clarity, and the soothing embrace of nature can create a harmonious symphony that is you.

Get in touch if you’d like a hand to move forward with greater wholeness or authenticity.

Sasha x